Last night’s episode of the Real Housewives of Atlanta was painful to watch as Kenya Moore basically begged Walter to marry her on national television. This baby took thirst to an entirely new level. Seriously, she needed an IV drip to treat her dehydration. I’m not sure what was more painful for me: 1) having to watch a woman beg for a man’s attention or 2) knowing I had once been that woman. 🙁 Anyway, in hopes that no other woman has to endure this type of humiliation, here are three lessons that should be learned from Kenya’s dance with doom.
Stop disregarding what he says. As Walter sat at the dinner table with Kenya and her family, he clearly stated he was open to marriage, BUT he would have to be in love to make that commitment again. Kenya didn’t hear this. She heard, “We are on the road to marriage.” Why did she hear this when no one else did? Were her ears clogged? Did her hearing aid battery die? No. Kenya did what way too many women do. She disregarded what he was saying and replaced his words with the words she wanted to hear. Women have the habit of overanalyzing what a man says and reinterpreting it to mean what they want to hear. It’s not that complicated. Men are not that deep. Take what they say at face value…unless they are lying, but that’s another blog.
“I’m going to do whatever it takes to get this ring.” Can we agree to stop this, ladies. You shouldn’t have to work for a ring. He should fall in love with the person you are and want to spend the rest of his life with that person. Stop setting unrealistic expectations, and don’t create façades that you won’t be able to maintain. Seriously, how long do you think it will be before he figures out you are microwaving meals instead of cooking them? The beautiful thing about marriage (at least in my head) is being with someone who sees you at your best and your worst and still wants to be with you. Don’t pervert that beauty with fakeness. Y’all better start sharing Whitney Houston lyrics with these dudes: Share my life. Take me for what I am cause I’ll never change all my colors for you.
Constantly talking about marriage and babies is a no, no. Let’s deal with reality. Men don’t grow up dreaming of weddings, kids and families. They just kind of get caught up in it. Eventually, they run across a pretty face, randomly realize they want no one else to have this woman, and before they can object, they are at the altar reciting vows and she’s dropping babies like hotcakes. It’s not that they are unhappy about it, but it’s definitely something men have to do at their own pace. Look, if you are the one, you don’t have to talk about it to convince him that you are the one, and if you’re not the one, no amount of talking is going to change that. Relax. Shut up. And in the words of Walter, “keep drinking, boo.” At least until it’s your turn.